Being Beaten is NOT a Loving Act

Being Beaten is NOT a Loving Act
Kerr Street Cafe
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About the Author

Nolan A Machan

Nolan A Machan

Nolan Machan is the Publisher of OakvilleNews.Org and has over 41 years of local Oakville knowledge. He is committed to providing Oakville residents with the most up-to-date information about our great town.

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With 1100 plus violent acts recorded against women in Oakville in 2012, the scourge of battered women is evident in our beautiful town. It is estimated that one-recorded act can actually be multiplied by four.  There of four women will not record at complaint, so 4400 plus daughters, mothers, grandchildren, aunts, grandmothers, and girl friends in Oakville are suffering.

After reporting the abuse to the police many of the women return to the abuser, and a few decide they have had enough and turn to the Halton Women’s Centre for assistance.

Take Ida who finally left her husband when her daughter was mirroring her dad’s abusive behavior by giving her mother a beating. Ida who is now a 64 year old women from our town, and a survivor. She is a beautiful woman with a large heart and a willing smile. You would never know by meeting her today that she received a weekly beating that resulted in black eyes and bruises all over her body. She would get drunk just to get through the raging beatings.

So why do these women stay in such violent worlds. For Theresa a 64 year old mother and now divorced from her abuser, she stayed because he was her childhood sweetheart.  He moved in with her when they were 15 years old. She was in denial thinking that abuse was what every married woman had to deal with. She was a mother, and wanted a home and a father for her children. Her abusive husband isolated her, a typical behavior of an abuser.

How does the abuse start for these women? It can start when they are three years old, as it did for Michelle a 32 year old who comes from a well-healed family. She was beaten every time she was left alone with her much older brother. He tormented her, and her pleas of help fell on the deaf ears of her parents. Denial by friends and parents of the abused is typical. Michelle was finally gang raped when she was 16.

After speaking with these beautiful soles who were willing to share their stories with me, I realized how many more women just like them were living in my community in silence. A silence so deafening that they have come to believe that there is no hope, no escape, no safe haven.

However there is hope and a safe haven in our town. The Halton Women’s Centre does provide a way forward with counseling and resources. If you think you are abused or can help here is their link.

The Halton Women’s Centre is located at 1515 Rebecca Street, Suite 229, and their number is (905)847-5520

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